When guys hit on you on the street

Recently there’ve been a couple of times where a guy has tried to pick me up on the street and it started me thinking about annoying things that guys think/do. Now, I would like to preface this by saying that generally street pick ups don’t piss me off. They may annoy me and I never have actually given my number to any of these guys, but in general if they behave decently I don’t really feel harassed or anything and I assume they wouldn’t be doing it if it wasn’t successful sometimes. The reason these encounters usually annoy me is because I’m usually preoccupied with something (running late, a book, music, etc) and as an introvert I would much rather continue to be occupied with these things as opposed to engaging random people on the street, which is a pain worse than slamming your finger in a door. Anyway…

Pick up #1: I’m waiting for a  bus and a guy comes up to me and is like “You have light eyes” and I really don’t know what to say to that (I think I just say thanks or something). Then he’s like “can I get your number” and I say “no thanks. I’m not interested”. Then he’s like “I can never get a light girl. You guys are stuck up”. And that’s when I went off. Usually, even when I don’t like something a stranger says, I just ignore them because I kinda don’t give a shit. But I draw the line at a guy who hits on me and then starts talking shit about me when I say I’m not interested in them. Maybe that’s because I think it points to a larger issue than just that particular person being a douche.  So I say something along the lines of “why am I stuck up? Just because I’m not attracted to you? Just like you have the right to hit on me because you’re attracted to me, I have the right to not give you my number because I’m not attracted to you. Or am I suppose to just give my number to anyone who talks to me on the street. I don’t have a right to have my own taste in people, is that it?”. At that point he started free-styling (did I mention that he just kept interrupting our conversation to freestyle?). Then he said “I didn’t mean to say you cant have your type. I’m just saying I can never get a light skinned girl”. Hmm… maybe because you talk about getting light skinned girls the way a fisherman would talk about catching a rare fish? Out loud I said “maybe you should say something other than ‘you have light eyes. you have light eyes'”. And I said it in a really doofusy voice. Then he started free-styling again.

Seriously, though. It seems like a lot of guys who don’t seem generally nuts(like aforementioned guy) just don’t take into consideration the idea that a woman is a person with their own likes and dislikes that may or may not mesh well with what the guy wants. I’m not even just talking about a situation like the above. I’m talking about guys who are just really persistent with a girl that’s already rejected them. It doesn’t seem to occur to them that the woman just isn’t interested in them, in their heads it’s just a matter of them having to do x y and z, then they’ll get the girl. Or guys who end a relationship because they think they aren’t good enough for someone/haven’t accomplished the necessary things to be in the relationship. That all sounds nice and chivalrous, but it kinda dismisses the fact that women are grown ass people that can make they’re own decisions about what kind of partner they want. I feel like these people are operating on some Mario shit where they have to cross a fire bridge and beat Bowser and then they’ll get a woman. (And I’m not referring to people who want to get their shit together before they settle down, that to me is reasonable. I’m talking about people who would end any relationship, serious or not, because they feel they haven’t earned the woman prize.) Or how “friend zoning” is a thing that’s discussed a lot, usually in the context of a woman doing it to a man because she’s a manipulative bitch. First of all, ALL SEXES have been ” friend zoned” but the rest of us just call that shit having a crush on a friend because that’s what the fuck it is. Second of all, BEING NICE DOES NOT ENTITLE YOU TO VAGINA. I’m mad this actually needs to be explained, but if you’re being nice in order to get laid, then you’re not actually being nice. You’re the one being the manipulative bitch in the situation because you’re pretending to be something you’re not in order to get something you want. (an aside: I don’t know if me and my friends are weird, but we tend to be nice and go out of our way for each other with no ulterior motives. Some guys will do things like buy their female friend a gift for no reason and think that they’re being extra nice and think that the girl is leading them on for accepting this behavior without dating them. My friends and I, however, do that shit ALL THE TIME. I’m about to buy this soap from an e-tailer for my friend just because I know she’d love the scent. This same friend just bought our mutual friend’s daughter a jacket just because she thought it would be really cute [and that little girl is way more stylish than me, although that’s not saying much]. But none of us do this with a thought in our head about wanting the other person to do something for us in return.) So, yeah… not really understanding the idea that not being a selfish asshole entitles you to something.

Pick up #2: Now, I’ll admit that this guy wasn’t really a jerk, he just irked me. So, I’m coming home from a club and I’m on the train and this guy sits in front of me and is like “where’re you coming from?”

me: boystown

him: oh that’s where those gays hang out

me:… yeah…I guess?

him: I can’t be hangin with those gays. You know what I mean?

me: Not really. (thinking: I just told you I came from boystown so why would I be on board with your dislike of gay people?)

him: can I get your number?

…. I’ma need a little more awareness of what’s going on. And I feel like this goes back to the point I was making before about how some men don’t really factor in the fact that women are autonomous beings. I think in his head 1.he worked up the courage to talk to me and 2.I didn’t slap him, so now he gets my number, right? No…. I have my own personality and I have to actually like you to give you my number. With that in mind let’s take a closer look at that conversation from my perspective:

him: I hate your faggot friends, can I get your number?

me:… why?

 

Not to be an ass or anything but I feel like if you start talking to me the burden is on you to get me to like you. We already know you like me because you’re talking to me, so now let’s pretend to give a shit about how I feel. And no, just you talking to me is not enough to make me like you. I’m not that desperate for dick, sorry. At any rate, how can you think about even having casual sex with someone you can’t even do successful small talk with. Do you just run into the bedroom with your hands over your ears, sex, and then run out before anyone can say anything? How does that work? I’m not even asking for a love connection, just the ability to not bore the shit out of me/piss me off before we throw down. I understand that rejection is hard, but that doesn’t make me responsible for soothing your ego by pretending to be interested in you when I’m not.

Halloween 2

Just wanted to document my impressions of the different haunted houses I went to.

 

Statesville: Pretty awesome. It had two parts The Prison and then Crypt of the Dead or something like that. It doesn’t matter what the second thing was named because it sucked anyway. I kind of got the impression that it was just kind of a spooky way to get us to the exit. The prison was pretty great though. I think they did a pretty good job of making it scary for everyone. Usually me and my friend try to get to the head of the group, because that’s where all the scares are, but with this one it didn’t matter quite so much. In order to get to the head of the group at Statesville you’d probably have to come up with some sort of algorithm or some shit anyway cuz they keep putting you in different length lines. 

Reapers Realm. Not great. There were three different haunts and The Darkness was the best one. For that one you had a flashlight and the lights kept flicker off and on, so got a couple of jumps out of me. The main haunt just didn’t have nearly enough people. There were tons a spots where they should’ve had someone to jump out at you, but didn’t. There were also a lot of sections where a scene was set up with no one in it. I guess the scenes were supposed to be creepy enough? They weren’t. Also there were a bunch of bridges and moving floors that fucking killed my knees. They’re attached to a carnival type thing, so if you’re there for the carnival it’s worth going to the haunts. But I wouldn’t drive out there for the haunts only.

 

Fear City: My favorite! Lots of jumps and cackling from me. One of the actors even mimicked my laugh, which only made me laugh harder. Also pretty awesome cuz basically it was a post apocalyptic Chicago, complete with a creepy L train. There’s also a section where they give you 3d glasses and the experience is pretty trippy, I’ve also never seen 3D sections in any of the haunt houses I’ve been to, so it was a nice change of pace. All around good times. This place had two haunts. What I just described was the first haunt, and then the second was more campy/fun. Kind of like a creepy carnival where you had to play games and complete task in order to move on with a couple of scares here and there (most were predictable though).

 

I also went to a couple of haunted houses not near Halloween. My favorite of which was Eleventh Hour. I also went to Disturbia which just wasn’t very scary to me. And I went out to  Creep Hallow, which was pretty nice. Not huge on the scare factor, but I liked that they had a whole experience. There was a haunted house, a haunted hayride/corn maze, and zombie shooting. They also had a bonfire and apple cider. I kinda wish I had taken s’more fixins. Maybe next year.

It’s Halloween! TREAT YO’ SELF!

Nowadays when I buy a ticket online, I’m a bit flabbergasted when I see a note saying that I must print the ticket in order to use it. In this day and age, businesses really need to just have something that can scan tickets off of a smartphone. Talk about a waste of paper.

In other news, I was just looking at the description of my blog and saw that I mentioned that I would talk about some stuff I like. I’ve not really done that so far. So here goes:

HALLOWEEN! Love it! Planned my weekend around it. Okay, not really. But I am taking tomorrow off and making a two day thing out of it. Me and my friend have a pretty long standing tradition of dressing up in similarly themed costumes and going to haunted houses. This year we’re gonna be Blaze and Axel from Streets of Rage (side note: once my status on facebook was “I am willing to risk anything, even my life…. on the… Streets of Rage” and my aunt post “oh no!”. I wonder what she thought I was talking about? Like, did she really think I was about to just go have a gun fight on the streets out of nowhere?). Anywhoo, some past costumes include: Chun Li and Cammy from Street Fighter (I’m sensing a theme here), Sonic and Mario, Thing One and Thing Two, Dexter and Batista… and many more!

So tonight we’re going to two haunted houses and then playing a bunch of Streets of Rage. The haunted houses are Statesville Prison and Reapers Realm. Never been to either which is especially surprising for Statesville because that one is iconic and we’ve been doing the haunted house thing for years. The problem was Dream Reapers(pretty much the most awesome haunted house ever) was our staple and we built the rest of the night around it. Statesville was just too dang far considering the fact that we always tried to squeeze in three haunted houses and they’re only open for like 4 hours. Sadly, some asshole burgled Dream Reapers. After which they had one last year and then had to close because the money they lost kinda crippled them financially. THAT ASSHOLE. So now we’re doing some new things this year.

Now tomorrow, gonna sleep in and then meet back up with my friend for brunch. Then we’re gonna head on up to Kings Spa, which isn’t really a spa so much as a bathhouse. They do offer some spa services but you can pay to get in and then the have a wet room and then a dry area. In the wet room you shower and then there are three different temperature hot tubbish things, one cold tub, and a steam room. In the dry area there are a bunch of couches(I mean A BUNCH), a cafeteria, and a bunch of different dry saunas. There’s also an upstairs area thats darker and has a bunch of lazy boy type chairs for napping or reading. Not a bad place if you don’t mind hanging out naked. Well, the wet area is the only place where you’re naked, they give you lounge wear for the dry areas. I like to take a bunch of different scented bath and body stuff (scented stuff is another thing I love). I’m definitely going to take my honey face mask from Skinfolk. That stuff is awesome when you put it on and then sit in the sauna. Otherwise stuff is up in the air. My fall order from Moonalisa just got delivered today, so I’ma smell that stuff when I get home and see if some of it is going with me to King’s. Other contenders are a Hothouse Roses scrub from PurpleCatCreative and… OH SHIT I forgot I just got a couple of Sandy Santas from lush! Um, I have to see what I have for my feet. I like to put something heavily moisturizing on them and then wear socks into the saunas. Gonna use an apple cider scent hair detangler from Olivia Morgana(not a great scent mixer, but you can’t go wrong with apple cider). And… whatever else. Afterwards gonna go to Fear City, last haunted house of the season for me. Gotta go smell my Moona! Halloween is awesome!

Shady Bus Drivers

     Me and my friend started having a discussion about racist bus drivers which starts with a story that she told me. Basically, a bus driver approached a bus stop that had a bunch of black teenagers (it’s right outside of a predominately black high school). Instead of stopping at the bus stop like normal she pulls about half a block ahead of the bus stop, opens the doors for a little bit, and then closes them before any of the kids get to it (they’re all running for the bus). I guess her intention was to do that and pull away immediately, but she got blocked by traffic so she was sitting for a minute while the kids were right outside the door ,yelling, trying to get her to let them on. She then pulls away without opening her doors for them. I made the comment that I really don’t think that would’ve happened if it was a group of white kids. My friend says she doesn’t agree because A. She’s encountered people who are just assholes to teenagers because picking on kids somehow makes them feel superior and B. Her boyfriend, who’s white, gets left by buses all the time. One of her friends does too, but she’s basically the Indian Liz Lemon, so I don’t think it’s fair to count her.

Me: Does your boyfriend get left like that? The bus driver fake pulling up to the stop and everything?

     She tells me that once a bus driver passed his stop (it’s a kinda odd middle of the street stop and he was the only one waiting there) and the the bus driver sees him after the fact and kind of stops for him, but then decides to drive off without letting him on.  Now, to me that’s different, mainly because I knew the stop that she’s talking about. I feel like sometimes bus drivers forget about it because it’s a random half block stop that’s in between two stops that are only a block away from each other. I’ve definitely been on this bus and pulled the string for that same stop and they go to the end of the block because they think that’s the stop I want. Missing a stop and then trying to pretend like you didn’t, to me, is different from deliberately  pretending to stop and not letting people on.

     Anywhoo, we end up going back and forth on this issue. Mainly her stance is bus drivers are sometimes disgruntled and she’s seen them be jerks to all different kinds of people. My stance is A. Being surly and deliberately not doing your job(which is to pick passengers up at every stop) are two different things and B. I’ve seen a lot of instances where a bus driver will treat black riders and white riders VERY differently (I don’t mean to pretend that there are only two races, this is just the main demographic of the buses I frequent). Like very rude and short to black passengers and polite/smiley/chuckly/giggly to white passengers. Or black people are standing at the bus stop and white people are standing a few feet away from the bus stop in the wrong spot and they pull up to the white people.

 

Two days later: I’m walking to a bus stop and I just missed the bus, but it’s stopped at a light only a couple of feet away. They’re only supposed to let people on at bus stops, but he’s so close to it that I think he can make an exception. I start waving my hand trying to get his attention and see if he’ll let me on. He looks at me and shakes his head no. Then a white guy runs over from across the street and waves at the bus. Dude opens the door. I get on after the white guy, but WHAT THE HELL. Seriously, two days after I have a conversation about exactly this with my friend. Ridiculous.

The grinch who fucked up my office?

So, I came into work yesterday and I found that my desk had been moved. Now my desk is in a corner and my back is facing the entire room and the door, which is uncomfortable as shit. There had been discussions about making changes to the room and we talked about moving my desk. I didn’t have any particular ideas about where to move it, but when dude suggested that we move my desk to this corner I said I didn’t like that idea. Not really sure how that sounded like “that’s great as long as you move it when I’m not around and without my knowledge”. And then today I went to dude and was like “can we move the desk somewhere else because this isn’t a comfortable position for me” and he’s like “well, sometimes this one person from one of the other departments likes to come in and view videos and tell us where to cut them and so I was thinking the desk needs to be in a position for them to be able to view your monitors. they haven’t done anything with us in the past 2 years, but supposedly that’s going to change”. Really? REALLY? I should sit around and be uncomfortable in MY OWN FUCKING OFFICE on the off chance that someone in a department we haven’t dealt with in 2 years can come over and review footage wrong. Clients are supposed to review footage from their own damn computers and then send you timecode. I’ve never heard of a client coming and watching an editor cut footage in real time. EVER. And honestly, who the hell thinks it’s ok to rearrange someone else’s office to fit their own idea of how it should be. I was pissed enough that he did it in the first place. But now I’m just fucking livid at the fact that I said I didn’t like it and instead of just fixing it, he’s sitting there telling me about random potential clients who should be more comfortable in my office than I am. What the fuck? Who does this?

In other news: Someone should make a remix of Titanium except the hook should be “I have adamantium”.